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Last Wills & Testaments – Class of 2018

I, Giovanni Aprigliano, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Isenberg, an unlimited amount of time so that you may finally finish an art piece; to Mrs. Cedeño and Mrs. González, a pair of virtual reality goggles and magical chancla that sends people to the basura list; to Mrs. Cofresi, an endless pocket of chocolate M&Ms; to Ms. Leonard, a huge thank you for an amazing year of math; to Ms. McGrath, a magnifying glass to find all my left over Post-it notes scattered all over your class.

 

I, Luis Arenado, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Lynskey, an original parachute from Easy Company; to Mr. Linfors, a Fathead of me with a thumbs-up; to Paul, a super-charged golf cart with nitrous.

 

I, Anthony Arguelles, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Coach Merritt, a lifetime supply of shampoo; to Coach Aviles, a 1stoverall pick in the 2019 NFL Draft for the Miami Dolphins; to Mr. McKeon, an autographed picture of David Ortiz; to Mr. Linfors, a 12-pack of Sam Adams and a good book, Dilly Dilly; to Mr. Lynskey, a portrait of him and me to hang in his office; to Coach Web, a nice house in South Carolina on a lake with a boat; to Coach Trujillo, a day of silence out of me.

 

I, Adrian Arrendondo, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mrs. Brown, thanks for letting me make up all my assignments the week the quarter ended; to Mr. Larrubia, if Drake had a sibling – you’d be the better looking brother; to Mr. Moro, you’re the nicest man I know.

 

I, Dalton Beck, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Coach Stewart, my respect for your intellectual challenges; to Mr. Martinez, a lead role in Nacho Libre, replacing Jack Black; to Ms. Valdes, respectful students; to Coach Husk, a new voice and a “Hhhhhheyyy!”; finally, to Mr. Linfors, my pillow I used to sleep in your class and my sincere gratitude in your effort to make my senior year awesome.

 

I, Jonathan Beltran, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Croke, a free weekend of golfing at the Biltmore; to Mr. Frazier, my soccer letterman; to Mr. Morrissey, a lifelong supply of lacrosse equipment; to Mrs. Brown, a never ending amount of patience.

 

I, Robert Benedit, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. OB, the OG, my torn labrum, so that he may repair his; to Mr. Morrissey, a kitchen job at Chick-Fil-a so that he may know why I slept everyday in his class; to Mr. Lynskey, I leave a pair of Air Jordan’s so that when he needs to wear sneakers he may be swagful; I also leave Mr. Lynskey a buffoon radar 5000 to know where the buffoon of the upcoming classes are located or near him; to Mr. Croke, I leave a bowl filled with golf balls, pebbles, sand and then topped off with an Ice cold SERBESA (AKA Cerveza), And there’s always some room for a l’il bit of jottage. 

 

I, Oscar Benitez, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: a life sized sculpture of Babe Ruth to Mr. McKeon; a record of Bob Dylan for Mr. Lynskey; and a card signed by Greg Nettles for Mr. Staiano. Also, I would like to give the students a free pass to skip homework assignments.

 

I, Tyler Blanco, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mrs. Galvez-Cuesta, an Amazon Echo that reads all her emails; to Mr. Kumer, a “Tyler” button; to Mr. Crossman, a “F” stamp; to Mr. Aviles, a punching bag; to Ms. Taylor, balloons.

 

I, Giovanni Borgeat, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Br. Herb, a thank you for everything; to Mr. O’Brien, another lecture to never forget.

 

I, Antonio Borjas, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Trujillo, a lifetime supply of Knaus Berry Farm honeybuns; to Coach Dukes, a yacht for fishing; to Coach Benitez, a framed picture of his bodybuilding days and a special ball for “Bidness” during the Walk-a-thon.

 

I, Charles Boyd, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Trujillo, a recording on a loop saying “Sorry Charlie”; to Mr. Croke, thank you for teaching me heaviocity every day; for Mr. Moro, a golden microphone with auto-tune included to record his next hit single “How are you, brother”; for Mr. Scholer, (Shut the door!) a publishing company and UM memorabilia for his museum; to Mrs. Gonzalez, the largest trash can in the world for her Basura! You are invited to all of my 34 weddings!; for Coach Dukes, his very own Sea Hunter open fisherman “S.S. Boyd”; for El Foyo, tickets to every Dallas Cowboys game for life!; to OB, his own starring role in Band of Brothers 2; and, finally, to Mr. Marinelli, a part-time job as Jordan Spieth’s caddy.

 

I, Nygel Brooks, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Br. Kevin, the basketball rim that me and Gary Cooper destroyed over the years (mostly Gary); to Ms. Vinson, thanks for my countless visits and for all the support through my four years.

 

I, Gustavo Busto, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Corazón, a final meeting at 2:30 and a Notre Dame national championship ring; to Mr. Lynskey, a book of all your favorite phrases; to Mr. Larrubia, a copy of “God’s Plan.”

 

I, Christian Cabrera, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Trujillo, an autographed Band of Brother disc by everyone that was in Easy Company; to Mr. Aviles, as much protein shakes as he can possibly consume; to Mr. Cantor, a How to Deadlift for Dummiesbook; to Mr. Ciocca, a Nobel Peace Prize for cheesy jokes; to Mr. Lynskey, a recording of him saying per usual per normal; to Mr. Parsons, more patience with his freshmen classes; to Mr. Marti, the ultimate conspiracy theory book; to Mr. O’Brien, a WWII documentary in every language. 

 

I, Jorge Cabrera, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Benitez, thanks for teaching me much more than just American History, AKA Benitez 101; to Br. Felix, thanks for always being the man and lending me money to buy doughnuts; thanks to Ms. Gonzalez-Rojas for being the coolest teacher ever.

 

I, Sebastian Callejas, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Mendoza, a Nicaraguan Sword of Freedom; to Mr. Randall Martinez, a sit down with John Oliver; to Ms. Brown, a stress ball.

 

I, Noah Capper, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Isenberg, a lifetime supply of napkins; to Paul, the fattest cigar I can get my hands on; to Coach Trujillo, a real tank from World War 2; to Mr. Ciocca, a CD that has some decent songs on it to play for his poor students; to Mr. Linfors, a nice pair of Bose noise cancelling headphones.

 

I, Diego Cardenas, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Trujillo, an hour with a reincarnated Dick Winters; to Br. Felix, a timeless music collection of Mozart; to Mr. Linfors, an all expense paid night at the World of Beer; to Ms. Taylor, a year long subscription for singing lessons.

 

I, Xavier Caso, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mrs. Cofresi, my Pope Francis doll; to Mr. Corazón, a life long supply of “likes, uhhs, umms, and you knows”; and to Mr. Linfors, a Twitter verification check.

 

I, Zachary Castano, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Ciocca, the Pitch Perfect soundtrack; to Coach Merritt, a D1 sized quarterback; to Coach Moscoso (Momo!), a slide step; to Ms. Rayneri, a late pass; to Mr. Peter Santa-Maria, Kevin’s breakfast.

 

I, Antonio Castellanos, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. O’Brien, a flight on a seaplane; to Mr. Delgado, a movie shown all over the world dedicated to him; to Ms. Insua, an endless supply of coffee from Starbucks; to Mr. Cunningham, a Christmas collection of the MADcomics; to Mr. Pugh, an incoming freshmen video every year to relive my days at Columbus!

 

I, Erick Chanez, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: Thanks – to Mr. Peter Santa-Maria, for being a great influence and mentor; to Mr. Scholer, all time greatest and funniest class I’ve ever been in; to Mr. O’Brien, for always having patience and knowledgeable.

 

I, Nelson Chang, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Isenberg, all the mats that you made me for AP; to Mr. Peter Santa-Maria, the 6-foot samurai print as a thanks for everything; to Mr. Croke, mojo; to Ms. Essig, the perfect yearbook.

 

I, Antonio Claro, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Pino, thank you for allowing me to cut the mileage; to Mr. Trujillo, a plane ticket to nowhere; to Mr. O’Brien, the pinnacle of human perfection, a kayak with a hole in the bottom; to Mr. Linfors, a Knight of Ni to watch over him; to Mr. Cunningham, a hammer and a sickle; to Mr. Ciocca, Bill Buckner’s glove for good luck.

 

I, Giancarlo Companioni, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Trujillo, every pink Starburst in existence; to Mr. Scholer, tickets to every Grateful Dead concert; to Mr. O’Brien, a living breathing Florida Panther; to Paul, I leave behind my favorite parking spot; to Mr. Linfors, I leave behind a big thank you for everything.

 

I, Alexander Contador, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Moritz, my attendance sheet; to Mr. Cesar Diaz, all my bowling gear; to Mr. Baez, I leave my Jeep so Jason can lay off his Highlander; to Mr. Pugh, the crutches I lent to “kneecap”; to Coach Scholer, I leave me, Mikey, and Gumers senior portraits; to Mrs. Gonzalez, I leave a thank you for being the first teacher that showed me the warmer side of Columbus.

 

I, Matthew Corazón, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Trujillo, a day with Major Dick Winters; to Mrs. Sanchez, a goldfish; to Mr. Aviles, an indestructible table; to Mr. Ortega, a bigger file cabinet; to Mr. McKeon, a Louis Hatem picture frame; to Mrs. Cofresi, a coin to help her students answer true/false questions; to Mr. Linfors, a day of Reduced Shakespeare Company performances and Capitals hockey; to my father Kevin Corazón, the inheritance he was never going to give me; to Señor Staiano, a better Hispanic accent; to Coach Morrissey, a book of every roast he ever gave; to Mr. Crossman, a Make America Great Again hat; to Ms. Taylor, food that can grow in zero gravity; to Mr. Kumer, more dinosaurs; and to my incoming brother, my uniforms and hoodies.

 

I, Andres Cordero, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Philip Santa-Maria, a dartboard; to Mr. Moro, a rap video of him saying “Stay, change, flip”; to Mr. Larrubia, a pimped out computer; to Mr. Peter Santa-Maria, a statue of himself holding a statue of me; to Mr. Chacon, a remote control doll from Saw.

 

I, Jorge Cortes, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Ciocca, an x-tra large bag of carrot sticks; to Mr. Bowman, plane tickets to Athens so he may visit the Parthenon; to Mr. Moscoso, a life-size effigy of Darth Vader that he can place somewhere in his classroom; to Mr. Isenberg, every 80’s classic rock album to ever exist; to Mr. Linfors, a 3-foot tall statue of Gollum; and to Mrs. Gonzalez, a real giraffe called Daisy.

 

I, Rafael Crespo, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Ms. Taylor, Anna Garcia and her pajamas along with the Litterati app; to Mr. Linfors, an endless amount of likes and replies to your tweets; to Mr. Rodriguez, model airplanes and zoo animals; to Mr. Harriman, a separate iPad to play Nova 3; to Mr. Cantor, the perfect push-up; to Mrs. Pita, endless lunches and a poster that says “quesadillas have cheese”; to Mrs. Cibran, a guide of JuJu’s; to Ms. Leonard, a cow and an airplane; to Mr. Larrubia, a book of magic tricks.

 

I, Alex Davide, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Marinelli, a thank you for the opportunity to attend the greatest school in the world; to Mr. Trujillo, my fast-twitch t-shirt; to Ms. McCullagh, one Oreo Quest bar; to Mr. Linfors, a thank you for the fun times with Sherlock Holmes in the summer and another Lord of the Ringstrilogy with extra battle scenes; to Mr. McKeon, a Giants Super Bowl; to Mr. Lynskey, a ticket to Europe so he can see every WWII site; to Coach Hill, a squat rack for legs.

 

I, Pedro De Rojas, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. O’Brien, thank you for teaching me about Florida’s History; to Mr. Scholer, an item for the museum of worthless stuff; to Mr. Croke, an elevator.

 

I, Dylan Escandell, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Rene Rodriguez, a season ticket for the Boston Celtics with his dogs; to Mr. Ulloa, every comic book that has come into existence; to Mr. Kumer, a lifetime supply of food from Ernesto’s Taco Shop; to Mr. Trujillo, a giant boat to go to Sweden.

 

I, Luis Felipe, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. O’Brien, my Godzilla DVD collection; to Mr. Linfors, the Monty Python and the Holy Grailbox set which comes in the shape of a castle at which to fling miniature toy animals; to Ms. Valdes, a fish tank full of dangerous sea life for all the kiddies to play with in class; to Mr. Kumer, a life size T-Rex with an In-N-Out Burger t-shirt for his dinosaur collection; to Mr. Corazón, a button that when pressed plays a recording of him saying, “Give me your phone!”

 

I, Deshay Fernandes, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Pino, my very first pair of track spikes used sophomore year; to Mr. O’Brien, my iPad for being on it too much during his class; to Mr. Foyo, my notebook because it contains all lecture notes and assignments; to Mr. Lynskey, a “No Really” badge; to Mrs. Mendoza, a Patience Badge for being a teacher with the highest tolerance possible and a thank you for being amazing; to Ms. Essig, thanks for also being amazing; thanks to the rest of the faculty and staff being the best high school faculty and staff ever.

 

I, Kevin Flaherty, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Rene Rodriguez, all of my respect to you and the impact you had on me; to Mr. Baez, a Spanish to English dictionary for all the words I missed; to Mr. Benitez, a fully stocked bar to invite old friends for a drink; to Mr. Bowman, Baltimore sports memorabilia hoping that your teams can finally win for once; to Mr. Trujillo, a letter everyday that reads “Flash” so that you can reply with “thunder”.

 

I, Miguel Flores, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Crossman, my Lex Luther cosplay; to Mr. Lynskey, a brand new pair of shoes to replace to Dad 2000’s; to Mr. Cunningham, a sense of worry for the expulsion of Russian delegates.

 

I, Sebastian Fuentes, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Coach Stewart, all the laps and Saturday mornings I had at this school; to Mr. Kumer, a lifetime supply of gallon water jugs; to Mr. Linfors, an iron bust of me to never forget and a book of dad jokes; to Mr. Lynskey, a lifetime supply of sunscreen for his scalp.

 

I, Alejandro Garcia, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Morrissey, a life-size figure of Jack Nicholson that can speak and only say, “But, sir”; to Mr. Ciocca, to lower the price of all baby carrots to move down along the demand curve so that he is more willing and able to purchase the good; to Brother Felix, a life time subscription of Nancy Pi math tutoring; to Mr. Aviles, a new screwdriver; to Mr. Linfors, more beer since his dad keeps drinking his; and to Ms. Raful, Mrs. Pita, and Ms. Vinson, a FERPA form on May 1st.

 

I, Joseph Garcia, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Ms. McCullough, an actual pocket size Constitution; to Mr. Linfors, an actual chance to meet Peter Jackson; to Mr. Moscoso, tickets to go see DJ Kool’s Let Me Clear My Throat; to Mr. Parsons, an hour of silence; to Mr. Trujillo, a Band of BrothersTour in Europe.

 

I, Marlon Garcia, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: thanks! – to Mr. Ciocca, for teaching the Ciocca addition method; to Mr. O’Neil, for making me lift a ton of bricks when I fall asleep in his class; to Mr. Moscoso, for being hard on me and treating me as one of his athletes; to Mr. Croke, for showing the way to achieving heavyocity.

 

I, Nick Garcia-Cartaya, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Linfors, my DC sweater to remember our time on Close Up; to Ms. Essig, new editors to take up the mantle; to Mr. Connell, a Viking helmet to remember his first environmental science class.

 

I, Tomas Gay-Betton, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Lynskey and Ms. Fernandez, a lifetime supply of razors and shaving cream to compensate for all the ones I used over the 4 years; to Mr. Aviles, a case of room temperature protein shakes; to Mr. Crossman, an orange and green handkerchief to dry off the tears from when FSU loses to UM in football for the next 4 years; to Mrs. Pita, a book on “How to Deal with Second Semester Seniors”; to Mrs. Brown, immaculate patience and ton of love from your boy.

 

I, Frederic Ghonda, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Frazier, a big bull; to Mr. Pino, unlimited GPS watches to give to runners; to Mr. Harriman, skills in Flappy Golf; to Br. Eladio, a thanks for reminding me it’s Monday or Hump Day.

 

I, Lukas Gonzalez, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Linfors, the Ring; to Mr. Scholer, an automatic closing backdoor; to Mr. Moritz, a day off.

 

I, Matthew Gonzalez, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Ms. Aycart, all of my many (too many) assignments from her class for her next batch of students; to Mr. Trujillo, a thank you for being a great teacher and for making his class my favorite in all of Columbus; to Mr. Cunningham, a set of records containing his favorite and ENDLESS Mozart symphonies.

 

I, Sebastian Gonzalez, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to underclassmen, advice and responsibility; to my fellow classmates, the fond memories accumulated in this school and that they reside in their minds forever.

 

I, Daniel Granados, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: I pledge to donate 20 stuffed llamas to Mr. Kumer’s room; to Mr. Baez, I will leave a brand new science lab for very engaged students like myself to utilize.

 

I, Louis Hatem, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Staiano, a recorder that plays McReynolds and my song on repeat; to Mr. Parson, a Phoenix; to Brother Kevin, my flip flops of dress shoes; to Mr. Kumer, the Palestinian flag; to Mr. Aviles, a new desk and some more protein shakes; to Ms. Brown, all of my late homework; to Brother John, a new printer; to Brother Herb, all of my “credit”; to Mr. McKeon, a handshake and all of my Dolphins jerseys.

 

I, Gregory Healy, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. O’Brien, some old timey newspapers.

 

I, Nicholas Hernandez, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Paul, the “Shark” because he deserves it.

 

I, Cameron T. Hidalgo, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Linfors, the Hobbitology trophy I didn’t win; to Coach Marti, all the Mojo donuts in Westchester; to Coach Moscoso (Momo!), I leave one hawk tackling drill; to Coach Trujillo, one Best Dad mug; to Mr. Martinez, a Trump cut-out; to Mr. Croke, all my heavyocity; to Ms. Essig, her class; to Mr. McKeon, a million dollars.

 

I, Xavier Hidalgo, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. O’Brien, a meeting with Totch so he can ask him anything he wants; to Mr. Bowman, season tickets to Ravens games and for Joe Flacco not to be mediocre; and to Dr. Saavedra, a tape that plays “Hello” every time someone walks in.

 

I, Franz Hoed de Beche, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Ms. McGrath, enough of a budget in the Drama program to take all the students to New York to see Hamiltonas well as full access to the Lawrence-Bell Center; to Br. Felix, a class full of students with no iPads; to Mrs. Cedeño, a pass to do whatever you want in this school; to Mr. Linfors, all of Middle-earth and students who will read everything you tell them to; to Mr. Moro, no more headaches and a life full of joy and love; and to all future students this message: we once had curly fries.

 

I, Bernardo Iglesias, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Baez, a messed up Periodic Table; to Mr. O’Brien, staying awake in your class for just one day; to Mr. Chacon, never having a warm class and making it feel as if we were in the North Pole; to Mr. Croke, another set of jottage; to Ms. Essig, another journal; to Mr. Oses, another daily quiz.

 

I, Drew Jacobs, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Trujillo, a real knowledge of who is actually good in the NBA; to Mr. O’Brien, every file ever written about the JFK assassination for closure, to Mr. Santa-Maria, a Paddington bear to carry around everywhere.

 

I, Victor Kusche-Iglesias, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Linfors, a thank you for expanding my creative knowledge and bringing joy everyday inside the classroom; to Mr. Isenberg, my appreciation for being an excellent human being and a man of class; to Mr. Mendoza, a thank you for being my first teacher at school and for an easy transition into high school; to Mrs. Pita, a thank you for helping me when times were tough.

 

I, Andres Labrada, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: the Grateful Dead Band revived for Mr. Scholer; more JFK conspiracy theories and flags for Mr. O’Brien; a book for Mr. Ciocca that tells him how to actually say a funny joke; and finally, every Lego set of The Lord of the Rings for Mr. Linfors.

 

I, William Lamey, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Parsons, a book interpreting body language; to Mr. Linfors, a one time use certificate for an attentive class; to Mr. Gonzalez, a live performance by Billy Joel; to Mr. Cunningham, his favorite scene from 12 Years a Slaveto play on repeat; to Ms. McGrath, a new oscillating fan; to Mr. Ciocca, a bag filled with an infinite amount of puns.

 

I, Justin Llanes, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mrs. McGrath, my eternal thanks for the best four years of my life; to Mr. Linfors, a copy of Pillars of the Earth; to Mr. Benitez, a Springfield Model 1873 flintlock musket; and to Mrs. Noy, my copy of Tom and Jerry Season One.

 

I, Andrew William Llovet, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Kumer, memories of student life here at Columbus; to Dr. Mederos, my unreflecting knowledge of my physics grade; Ms. McGrath, my creativity for always encouraging it; to my brother, a pair of glasses to recognize in the hallway.

 

I, Gonzalo Londoño, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: my sacred bag of baby carrots and yogurt to Mr. Ciocca; a tub of pink hair dye for Mr. Delgado’s beard; and to Mr. Frazier, a large cardboard cut out of my smile from me, “The best smile in America,” as he would say.

 

I, Daniel Lopez, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Corazón, a pair of boxing gloves; to Mr. Crossman, my height and hair; to Ms. Brown, a razor and shaving cream; to Mr. Linfors, an awesome life.

 

I, Hayden Love, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Kumer, a long-sleeve shirt to hide shrinking biceps; to Mrs. Cofresi, a slingshot to subdue kids who act out; to Mr. Linfors, extra days of time in your class to make up for my random absences; to Mr. Trujillo, boxing gloves and a stress ball; to Mr. Crossman, a year’s worth of attention that I wish I had paid more of.

 

I, John Maderal, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Linfors, a time to share many more funny stories; to Mr. Trujillo, unlimited Postmates; to Mr. Lynskey, many more years of patience to deal with us buffoons; to Mr. Isenberg, as many drawing pencils as his heart desires; to Ms. Fernandez, a way to ease her job.

 

I, Joseph Martinez, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Kumer, a “synthesis” poster and a doorstop; to Mr. Ciocca, a used Yugo; to Mr. Ulloa, an excuse to watch your favorite movies; to Mr. Marti, an excuse to watch your favorite shows.

 

I, Thomas Martinez, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: unto Mr. Ciocca, an Economan action figure, complete with an array of sayings, such as “Price don’t shift a curve”; for Mr. Isenberg, more patience; and lastly, for Mr. Linfors, a hand forged Anduril, as repayment for my new found fondness for reading.

 

I, Shawn McReynolds, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Coach Trujillo, a day all his linebackers take proper slide steps; to Coach Merritt, a coupon for tattoo cover-ups; to Mr. O’Brien, the answers to all of his conspiracy theories; to Mr. Frazier, a thank you for making Columbus students look intellectual for being able to solve a Rubik’s Cube; to Brother Kevin, an in-box full of alumni donations.

 

I, Christopher Mederos, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. O’Brien, a flag of the 1stAirborne; to Mr. Weber, a huge picture of me; to Mr. McKeon, a poster of me in a Boston Red Sox uniform.

 

I, Sebastian Medina, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: thanks to Mr. Benitez, an amazing teacher and person who taught me a lot about life; thanks to Mr. O’Brien, whose class I would always miss; thanks to Mr. Foyo, for being the most helpful person in the world; thanks to Mr. Rene Rodriguez, a veteran in geometry; to Mr. Cooper, every instrument in the world; to Mr. Ibarra, a thank you; to the rest of the Columbus staff and faculty; a thank you for everything and Adelante!

 

I, Anthony Merdjane, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Frazier, a “hey bub” that will last forever; to Mr. Ciocca, a lifetime supply of FRQ’s to use as quizzes; and last and certainly least, to Mr. McKeon, all the service hours he’s acquired putting up with me. 

 

I, Gregory Mesa, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Crossman, a libertarian manifesto; to Mr. Kumer, a formal feudal lordship in the Palestinian state; to Mr. Panzer, five US Sherman tanks – his only weakness; to Mrs. Cofresi, a tightly bound metal chancleta with ergonomic grip; to Mrs. Chomat, a mason jar for her students’ tears to age.

 

I, Kevin Miller, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr./Coach Parsons, a new pair of blue shorts to wear on the field and some shaving cream for that beauty of a beard; to Father Ibarra, an endless supply of movies and spray on hair; to Br. Felix, a Mets 2015 World Series shirt; to Mr. Linfors, an endless supply of LOTR collectibles.

 

I, Nicolas Morales, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Linfors, an immortal life in Middle-earth; to Mr. Moro, protective headgear; to Mr. Benitez, a thank you for the Benitez 101; to Mr. Trujillo, a private yacht to go anywhere he pleases.

 

I, Jack Morrissey, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Aviles, a punching bag; to Mr. Pino, an alarm clock.

 

I, Alejandro Navarro, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Hermida, tickets to the Logic concert; to Mr. Larrubia, a Drake hoodie; to Mr. Aviles, a personal assistant to shake his protein shakes; to Mr. Morrissey, a wheeled backpack to carry all his work back home; to Mr. Linfors, a verified Twitter account and a million new followers; to Mrs. Pita, a cleared schedule; to Br. Herb, a bouncer for the training room to keep out the yoyo’s; to Mrs. Cofresi, a new Wall of Weird.

 

I, Andres Navarro, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Br. Herb, the $150 I owe him; to Mr. Cunningham, the vocab notebook that got me an A for the year; to Mr. Kumer, the effort I didn’t put in during his class; to Mr. Stewart, all the hoodies he took from me and the razors he made me use.

 

I, Roberto Nieves, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Ciocca, a pop quiz and a better AC unit; to Ms. Raful, an updated Naviance account; to Mr. Marinelli, a state championship ring.

 

I, Carlos Novo, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Moscoso, the 12 episodes of Girls’ Last Tour; to Mr. Moritz, a Slim Jim and a can of beans; to Mr. Philip Santa-Maria, a recreational nuclear bomb; to Ms. Meadows, all of the time after school she spent on the video game club; to Mr. Isenberg, every copy of Fortnite ever (to be destroyed).

 

I, Jonathan Ojeda, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Baez, thanks for constantly being able to joke and for teaching us the entire chapter five minutes before to pass the test; to Mr. Lynskey, a Comedy Central stand-up show; to Coach Moscoso (Momo!), a lifetime supply of Kaliks.

 

I, Jonathon O’Neil, being sound and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Ciocca, a bag of carrots to annoy anyone taking a test with; to Mr. Marti, a jacket for the freezing temperatures in your class; to Ms. Fernandez, a tardy slip to remember the good times; to Mr. Lynskey, thank you for letting me shadow you; to EVERY teacher whose had me, I leave you a pillow for letting me sleep in class. 

 

I, Luis Orta, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Trujillo, a Japanese soldier from WWII; to Mrs. McCullagh, a box of donuts; to Mr. Cooper, a MIDI keyboard; to Br. Felix, a New York Jets jacket.

 

I, Lucas Ortega, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Cunningham, a short break; to Mr. Linfors, a first draft copy of The Lord of the Rings; to Mrs. Cofresi, a copy of The Wizard of Oz; to Mr. Corazón, my phone; to Mr. Ciocca, a six pack of yogurt; to Mr. Aviles, a large container of protein; to Mrs. Cedeño, a copy of Frozen, and to Mr. Ortega, a $5 bill for lunch.

 

I, Alec Palacio, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Moro, a math-belt to hold all his mathematical equipment; to Paul, a megaphone so all the world will know to not turn “left”; to Mr. Trujillo, an all expense paid bus ride to all historical locations in the US; to Mr. Kumer, a llama farm so he may enjoy their company with his friends.

 

I, Carlos Parra, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Trujillo, an Arsenal FC jersey and a plane ticket to Europe; to Mr. Linfors, a day with Frodo; to Mr. Moro, all of the Pink Floyd albums; to Mr. Philip Santa-Maria, a day with the cast ofPaddington 2; to Ms. Raful, a thank you for making mornings more fun; to Mr. Frazier, a Venezuela flag.

 

I, Matthew Patterson, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Coach Dukes, a fishing rod and a thanks for everything; a 3×3 foot Rubik’s Cube for Mr. Frazier; a life-size cut out of Economan for Mr. Ciocca; to Mr. Moritz, a framed version of all my labs so future students know what perfection looks like.

 

I, Justin Pedron, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mrs. Gonzalez-Rojas, a thank you for everything; to Mr. Corazón, a ticket for a meet and greet with Warren Buffett; to Br. Tom, a life size sculpture of Pope Francis; to Mr. Santa-Maria, a lifetime free movie pass, so he can see any movie for free; to Mr. Davis, a plane ticket to Europe; to Mr. Pugh, a Ben Roethlisberger signed helmet; to Mr. Scholer, a ticket to Coachella to experience a festival like Woodstock; to Mr. Foyo and Mrs. Foyo, a vacation home in Santa Monica, California.

 

I, Anthony Pellerano, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Ciocca, a bag of baby carrots and yogurt as dip; to Ms. Raful and Ms. Vinson, a big Thank You banner; to Br. Felix, a NY Jets jersey; to Mr. Cunningham, a Russian ninja mask; and lastly, a sword to Cesar Man, the computer dude.

 

I, David Pernia, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Linfors, a lifetime supply of hazelnut coffee; to Mr. Frazier, the world’s biggest Rubik’s Cube and a button that says “bub” every time your press it; to Ms. Leonard, a Physics textbook titled Algebra and Blah Blah; to Ms. Rayneri, $100 for every student that comes to you after school to finish Computer Apps assignments.

 

I, Robert Perry, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Moro, a high-tech microphone for his math videos; to Mr. Larrubia, a dog named Karel; to Mr. Ciocca, an album by The Band Perry.

 

I, Eric Pijeira, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: Thanks! – to Mr. Trujillo, for not only teaching history lessons, but lessons that made me a better man today; to Mr. Corazón, for boosting my confidence and professionalism when I did not believe in myself; to Mr. Pugh, Mr. McKeon, and Mr. Lynskey, for guiding my fellow classmates and myself to make good decisions and not poor ones; to Mr. Croke, for helping me be more connected to my faith and my family.

 

I, André Pineda, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Lynskey, my collection of non-regulation hoodies; to Mr. Frazier, a new putter; to Mr. Trujillo… “Flash!”; to Mr. Ciocca, a “Take out a blank sheet of paper.”

 

I, Michael Proenza, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Davis, a new hiking bag for your second stint on El Camino; to Mr. Kumer, one more 12×12 burger from In-N-Out; to Br. Felix, eyes on the back of your head to catch the hooligans making the animal noises.

 

I, Daniel Quiñones, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Trujillo, a tour all over Europe and Japan for WWII sites but no plane rides; to Mr. Kumer, an all you can eat at Ernesto’s.

 

I, Daniel Ramirez, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Larrubia, enough cryptocurrency to fix his car’s AC; to Mrs. Chomat, all the café in the world; to Mr. Sanchez, a group of students actually willing to turn in the labs on time.

 

I, Nicholas Richards, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Corazón, who couldn’t beat me in the stock market games, an edition of Stock-Trading for Dummies; to Mr. Aviles, some earmuffs for when the announcements go on; to Mr. Scholer, people who would invest in his endless genius investments; to Mr. Trujillo, a man-bun for a day; to Br. Felix, some up-dog.

 

I, Jaime Rivas, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Ciocca, a demand curve that is shifted by price; to Mr. Kumer, a green laser pointer.

 

I, Raul John Rivera, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Croke, one moment of Zen; to Mr. Linfors, a 1 to 1 scale statue of Aragorn; to Mr. O’Brien, a personal interview with Major Dick Winters for as long as he would desire; to Coach Trujillo, one pursuit drill; to Coach Moscoso, one t-shirt with Zach Castano’s face on it; to Coach Merritt, one state championship; to Coach Foyo, a single missed assignment; to Mr. Oses, a curve; to Coach Pino, one Frodo comparison; to Dr. Burrus, one firm handshake.

 

I, Christian Rodriguez, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Marti, a large “Objection!” sign; to Mr. DiBernardo, a golf cart with air conditioning and fully tuned everything; to Mr. Aviles, a PlayStation 2 attached to his room Cleartouch display (with two controllers); to Mr. O’Brien, a P-38 pilot seat; to Mr. Crossman, an entire crate of butter; to Mr. Pino, tickets to the next Peral Jam concert; to Mr. Cunningham, a record player with all of his favorites hits; to Mr. Morrissey, a dry Christmas tree; to Ms. Valdes, a large touch tank that I regretfully didn’t get in time; to Ms. Essig, a daguerreotype camera; to Mr. Ciocca, the body shell of a Firebird Trans Am with an air filter to start him off; to Mr. Cooper, a full-size harpsichord; to Mr. Linfors, the latest model in the Keurig Coffee-maker lineup.

 

I, Javier Rodriguez, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Delgado, daily visits from Br. Eladio to the studio; to Ms. Insua, an umbrella; to Ms. Raful, a new year filled with at least 20 Cuban immigrants telling you real and imaginary stories and applying to college all at the same time; to Mr. Scholer, an endless supply of turtle pies; to Mr. Foyo, my CCNN Live jacket; to Mr. Trujillo, a never ending amount of gift cards to 7-11; to Br. John, a full ride to the Fort Lauderdale School of Hair Design; to Dra. Folch, an unlimited supply of tabletas y teléfonos; to Mr. Pugh, another year filled with great success as principal.

 

I, Nicholas Rodriguez, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Ms. Vinson, thank you for everything; to Mr. Lynskey, thanks for the humor.

 

I, Noah Rodriguez, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mrs. Gonzalez, the plans to the ultimate Pachanga and the best basura picker upper; to Mrs. Cofresi, an angry letter complaining about how I never made it on her Wall of Weird.

 

I, Chris Rojas, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: a single solitary dollar to Mr. Santa-Maria; to Mr. O’Brien, a T-34 Stalin tank; to Mr. Gonzalez, one birthday wish.

 

I, Michael Rosales, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Br. John, thank you for allowing me to print out all my paper’s for English right before Mr. Linfors’ class; to Mrs. Pita, thank you for answering my simple college questions; to Mr. Trujillo, a toy plane to soothe his phobia of flying.

 

I, Gabriel Ruiz, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Marinelli, all the chocolates that I have taken from his office; to Br. Tom, my Marist Youth polo; to Mr. Gonzalez, a big tall sangria.

 

I, Ray Santiago, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. O’Brien, another kayak; to Mr. Delgado, WiFi that actually works; to Mr. Moritz, a pack of gum; to Ms. Essig, a day of no paragraphs; to Mr. Trujillo, a lifetime supply of patience.

 

I, Andrew Schwarte, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Ms. Essig, a phantom drone; to Mr. Trujillo, a trip to Normandy; to Mr. Lynskey, a day with zero buffoonery; and to Mr. Connell, unlimited tickets to the rodeo.

 

I, Victor Soca, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Baez, his comedic stories; to Mr. O’Brien, a legend who can talk about WWII all day; to Mr. Philip Santa-Maria, a comedian who makes micro easy to learn.

 

I, Ricardo Somarriba, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Ms. McGrath, all the luck and patience in the world for next year’s drama program; to Ms. McCullagh, the actual Constitution; to Mr. Linfors, life-size replicas of all the swords and armors used in The Lord of the Rings; to Mr. Trujillo, a boat ticket to Sweden.

 

I, Juan Alberto Suarez, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Linfors, a case of Samuel Adams Boston Ale; to Mr. Cunningham, an induction into the Civil Society Hall of Fame; to Ms. Fernandez, an email from my parents explaining why I was late; to Ms. Raful, a key to her office; to Paul, thank you for the peace of mind you have given us these years; to Mr. Lynskey, thank you for a great four years.

 

I, Mickey Suarez, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Connell, an Auburn Tigers national championship; to Mr. Frazier, weekly golf lessons for the rest of your life; to Mrs. Gonzalez, your very own TV show on girl trouble; to Mr. Delgado & Ms. Insua, the commitment and hard work that I did not give you over the past four years; to Ms. Raful, directions to your office; to Ms. Aycart, a coupon to buy new markers and scissors; to Mr. Linfors, a signed Mickey Mantle trading card.

 

I, Joseph Tonarely, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Kumer, one more visit to the old man in the shack; to Mr. Linfors, a year long Close Up trip; to Mr. Trujillo, a blonde in a pick-up truck.

 

I, Ralph Umbay, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Trujillo, plane tickets to Europe; to Mr. Cooper, a coupon for a free haircut and a shave; to Ms. Essig, a Wendy’s Baconator; to Br. Eugene, gold rims for his scooter.

 

I, Gabriel Valdes, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Moritz, clip on ties so they never come loose; to Ms. Essig, “Just one more paragraph”; and thanks to the Man, the Myth, the Legend, Paul, for keeping the senior parking controlled.

 

I, Gregory Valerius, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Ms. Fernandez, a never ending supply of pink Starbursts; to Mr. Kumer, a very, very large hug and an interruption of his lecture for a nonsensical remark; to Ms. Taylor, a tape recording of “chicooooo”; to Mr. Cunningham, a trophy shelf for the geography bee trophies to come; to Coach K, a big thank you for pushing me to be my best and not giving up on me; and to Mr. Crossman, a Willie Taggert poster and the emphatic position in my Last Will and Testament.

 

I, Nicolas Vaillant, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Scholer, a hardcover edition of Scholer’s Life Notes; to Mr. Delgado, the oldest, cheapest, lowest-quality back-and-white digital camcorder I can find; to the faculty running the library, 90 cents because I just needed to print one page; to Mr. Santa-Maria, a sticker of a yellow and black smiley face with sunglasses; to Mr. Larrubia, a pair of pink, striped programming socks; to CCNN, a link to download Windows Movie Maker; to myself, a 6.0 GPA.

 

I, Rafael Vergara, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: Ignorance is the absence of knowledge; stupidity is the conscious rejection of it. Ignorance can be fixed, stupidity cannot.

 

I, Felipe Vidal, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: thanks Mr. Pugh for being a good principal; thanks Br. Herb for all the snacks; thanks Mr. Lynskey for the sarcastic humor; and I wish I could have Mr. O’Brien WWII all year.

 

I, Mateo Zavalia Lagos, being of sound mind and body do hereby bequeath: to Mr. Lynskey, a “Yes, really”; to Mr. Stewart, a Columbus-issued ID with a lanyard; to Mr. Corazón, a diversified portfolio and computer parts; to Mr. Linfors, a bubbly fountain.

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